There are different levels of friendship — from casual to intimate. Today, I’d like to focus on one very important level… close friends.
Close friends are those who you:
- Pick up a phone to check in with
- Want to hang out with because they have significance in your life
- Feel pure joy around
What else do you feel around them?
- Affirmed
- Normal
- Significant
- Clarity
Close friends are not greedy.
While these types of friends might be a part of your life for years and years, you can go months or even years without talking to them.
Whether one of you moved far away or life just took a crazy turn, it doesn’t make a difference. When you do reconnect, it’s like no time has passed and — more importantly — there’s no bitterness, no weirdness or judgment.
When close friends are close by.
At such time when your stage of life matches with their stage of life, you want to invite them to everything! You’re going out to dinner, movies, shopping and just wanting them to be part of any sort of social engagement.
Simply put, you want them to be by your side because they make you feel really comfortable. You love being in their company and only want good things to happen for them. They’re absolute family and you root them on in all of their endeavors!
When Seasons Change In Friendship.
Sometimes close friends are going through different seasons in life. Maybe she got married and you’re still single and you’re lives drift apart. So, you don’t spend as much time together during this particular season. But, there’s nothing to worry about because you both know that bond is there and nothing can break it.
Close Friendships Take Time To Develop.
You can’t force a close friendship. It’s going to have to go through ups and downs — argue, work through it, learn to apologize and get over it. You have to establish trust.
If trust is broken, this person might go back into the general or casual friends category. You might think of them as someone who’s formally a close friend. And that’s okay because, frankly, you don’t have a lot of spots on the bench for close friends.
When I meet someone and they tell me, “Oh, I’ve got 20 close friends,” I’m a little incredulous, thinking…
“20 close friends!? Really!?”
Because you have to devote time, energy, care and empathy into anyone you consider a close friend. Nobody has time for more than a handful. And dare I say that anyone who says they have 20 close friends — probably — isn’t a very good friend. How could they be when there are other relationships to juggle and tend to — from intimates to a significant other?
For much more on this topic, like:
- Why you don’t need affirmation from someone else to know that you’re lovable
- Ways friendships differ from romantic relationships
- How friendships can provide accountability
- All the different levels of friendships and details behind each
- How social media complicates the definition of friendship
Then, check out The Chalene Episode Below:
And don’t forget to subscribe to TCS for weekly shows that are geared toward getting your whole life right!
