DISCLAIMER: This blog is not for you if you’re related to me. Most especially my kids, Brock and Cierra. However, this blog is for you if things are lacking spice and feeling just a little stale / less exciting in your marriage or with your significant other.
But first, you should know that while the following tips have always been in play in my marriage, they became far more effective once Bret and I worked through some major challenges.
So, if you and your person are going through super tough stuff (the kind that festers inside), then I’d recommend — beyond all things — to seek marriage counseling.
3 Tips To Spice Up Your Relationship
Number 1: Make an effort to be physically attractive every day.
Think about your:
- Overall appearance
We are attracted to each other, first and foremost, physically.
Now, maybe you think this tip is shallow and feel,
“Well, he should just love me any way that I show up!”
But — let’s let’s face it: It’s a sign of confidence when someone cares about their appearance. And there’s nothing more attractive than confidence.
Also, when you try to look your best… it signals to your partner that you care about them and how they feel.
Number 2: Never complain about yourself to your spouse.
If you’re speaking negatively about yourself — and your body in particular — how do you think your partner is going to feel about your body? How will they feel about your confidence? There’s that word again.
Number 3: Talk about a sexy dream you didn’t really have.
I will often tell Bret that I had a particular kind of dream — even if I didn’t exactly have one full of spice. Shhh.
And it’s always about one of his fantasies (because that is what gets him really excited).
Sexuality is a very natural, loving part of being a couple. It adds to being connected and committed to each other. So, we have to remove the taboos and make it more fun and less of a chore.
No matter how long you’ve been together you can improve this area of your life!
And yeah, sometimes that takes stretching the truth about what you dreamed about last night.
It’s okay, it’ll be our little secret.
Speaking of secrets…
Number 4: Keep top secret things top secret.
When Bret and I are going on a date night, for example, I don’t want him coming upstairs — until I’m totally ready. He doesn’t need to see half of the complete project. Having some mystery in a relationship is a good and healthy thing.
For much more detail on each of the points above — filled with candid personal anecdotes from my marriage — PLUS, additional sexier tips with lots of spice (if you know what I mean)… then check out The Chalene Show episode below:
And don’t forget to subscribe to TCS for weekly episodes that cater to all aspects of your life, from relationships to personal development to health!