There’s a famous concept in journalism that I’d like to apply toward relationships. It’s referred to as The Five Ws or, sometimes, The Five Ws and One H — which stands for the following:
- Who
- What
- Where
- When
- Why
- How
Normally, these words are used by a reporter as a prompt for 6 questions to answer in the opening paragraph of a news story.
But why would memorizing and putting into practice the 5 Ws and H be a game changer for anyone living with others in quarantine?
And how can this formula, if you will, improve relationships and — more importantly — communication?
To be clear, the kind of communication I’m referring to is where you’re looking to ask someone to:
- Do something
- Understand your point of view
- Cooperate
- Participate
When to use WHEN
Whether you’re currently in quarantine or reading this PQ (post quarantine), if you’re living with someone… you know them well (enough).
You’re able to gauge the mood of your housemates accurately and trust when it might be a proper time to approach a myriad issues. Like, when they’re feeling good about themselves, happy, and /or confident.
I’m guessing you also know when it wouldn’t be a good time to address certain things. Like, when they’re busy, stressed, or it’s the wrong time of day.
Now, for certain conversations, you really have to use common sense and self-control. Because when it's something important (to us), our overriding thinking tends to be,
“This has to be talked about right now! I'm upset and I need to address this.”
When we want someone to change their thinking on a pressing matter, it all just seems to urgent, right?
Nonetheless, you’ve got to hit the pause button and then consider,
“What is it that I want?”
The next question I’d like you to consider is,
“Do I desire this outcome badly enough?”
See, if you truly do want him or her to see your perspective on things, then you would be willing to wait.
Hold tight until:
- He’s in the right mood
- She’ll receive your words from a positive mindset
- They’re receptive to this particular conversation
The point is, for a successful conversation to occur, you must take into account the other party. This is a 2-way street, people. To ultimately get what you want (or closer to it), remember:
It’s not about when it's good for you, it's all about when it's right for them.
We’ve only covered 1 of the Ws and no H! For a breakdown of the remaining 5 words and how to apply them to relationships, check out the The Chalene Show episode below!
And don't forget to subscribe to TCS for weekly shows dedicated to you living your best life — with or without quarantine!
